Walking With The Dead: How To Survive A Zombie Apocalypse

Walking With The Dead: How To Survive A Zombie Apocalypse

I think I would frighten myself to death in the case of a zompocalypse …

Remote Control Freak

A common or garden zombie horde. Photo: AMC A common or garden zombie horde. Photo: AMC

I love The Walking Dead. It’s gory, moody and intense. The story arcs are shocking and the characters are well developed. But I mostly love it because it has zombies. Proper zombies too, none of this I-Am-Legend World-War-Z rubbish that can run and think and strategize. These are good, old-fashioned zombies that stumble around, banging into things, and whose only motivation is satisfying hunger.

The only thing that bothers me about the zombies in TWD is the fact that we never find out what brought about their demise. Was it an infection? A lab experiment gone wrong? Could it happen to us in actual, real life? I have my fingers crossed for “what, are you an idiot? Of course not” because I’d have no idea what to do.

People don’t talk about zombies enough. If they did, it wouldn’t be weird to…

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#TBT: Diagnosis Murder

#TBT: Diagnosis Murder

Remote Control Freak

Throwback Thursday: the shows that are long gone but I still can’t shut up about

The seasons 1-2 (and best) cast. Photo: CBS The seasons 1-2 cast: Delores Hall, Barry and Dick Van Dyke, Scott Baio, Victoria Rowell and Michael Tucci . Photo: CBS

When I was twelve, I discovered Diagnosis Murder. I’d race home every day after school to catch the 5 o’clock double bill on the Hallmark Channel. (All re-runs. It was 2005.) For months it was the best thing I’d ever seen. I recommended it to all my pals and I set a photo of the cast as the desktop background on the family computer.

I remember spending a good ten minutes telling a year 8 classmate the plot of a two-part episode I had found particularly riveting (The One with the Laughing Gas) while she smiled and nodded. It wasn’t until later that I realised she probably didn’t care. Kids don’t watch Diagnosis Murder…

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Eurovision Twitterati

Eurovision Twitterati

Remote Control Freak

New Queen of Europe Conchita with her coveted Eurovision. Photo: EILE Magazine. New Queen of Europe Conchita Wurst with her coveted Eurovision trophy. Photo: EILE Magazine.

I have a new idol. Her name is Conchita. Not only does she have salon-quality hair and the lung capacity of the Royal Albert Hall, she also managed to woo most of the continent into voting for a bearded Austrian trans* woman to win the Eurovision Song Contest. After the year of intolerance we’ve had from some (not naming any names, just putin it out there), Conchita’s win is also a massive victory for individuality and LGBT communities everywhere.

In her winner’s speech, she said: “This is dedicated to everyone who believes in a future of peace and freedom. We are unity and we are unstoppable.” Does the Queen ever knight Austrians? Can she knight Conchita? Can someone at least get her some kind of medal?

It was a spectacular moment. Unfortunately, I missed it all.

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